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Monday, April 18
 
LAST MONDAY: An Explanation

By now, I hope that you've seen BobTshirts illustration of how last Monday night turned out. Now, I will try to match that MSPaint picture with a picture of words.

I had decided to take it easy that night, work on some stuff around the apartment and maybe watch a little TV. That's when it all began--I heard noise from the next door apartment---fightin' words. It sounded like it was between a couple (I've really never met the people who live next door so I really am not sure who lives next door) and it was escalating in a very weird way. Here's kind of how it went down, to the best of my memory:

MALE: Why?!
FEMALE: I'm sorry! Nothing happened!!!
M: Why, you stupid bitch?!
F: I'm sorry! Stop it! Stop it!
M: I want more than one kid!
F: Stop it!
M: @#$% (unintelligible)
F: I love you, I love you, I love you!

Now, that's not verbatim, it's just what I happen to remember. Anyway, by this time, I had picked the phone up and was debating about whether or not I should call 911. After a couple of minutes, though, it was quiet again and I continued about my business. I figured, "Hell, this might just be how these people talk to each other everyday". That was no more comforting than the idea that this was an anomaly, though. It was time for Family Guy so I quickly forgot about what had happened.

About half an hour later(just when Family Guy was ending--coincidence?), I heard the sound of what sounded to me to be a gunshot. At this point I think "fuck it, I'm leaving" and that's what I proceed to do. To quote the Poison song 'I Want Action'--I grab my hat and grab my shoes, [I was] on the way to hit the streets and cruise. So, that's what I did. I also grabbed my cell phone on the way in order to call 911.

As I step out of the door, I see a police car pull into the parking lot. I think, "oh good". A cop gets out of his car and yells out "how ya doin' tonite, buddy?"

"Fine" I reply.

I start to walk down the stairs to the ground floor when it hits me that the cop probably thinks I'm the guy that has the gun. Turns out, I was right.

By the time I reach the bottom of the stairs, a couple of cops have their guns and flashlights on me and are demanding to know what I have in my hand. "It's a phone, it's a phone!" I yell and show them. I have to keep my hands raised with my back to the cops and back up towards them. They're not at all cordial to me, by the way. My favorite part about this part of the story is that I have my Unknown Hinson shirt on (from my recent trip to Asheville to see the King--refer to earlier post) so as I'm backing up, the cops are seeing the back of my shirt which reads in large letters: "The Future Is Unknown!"

I finally explain to the cops that I'm leaving because I heard the gunshot and it's the apartment beside me that the shot came from. I guess they believe me because they proceed to kick in the apartment door and pay my neighbors a courtesy call. By this time, there were 5 or 6 cops. The first cop had told me to wait in the parking lot but I didn't want the first thing some guy who had shot a gun in an apartment to see was me standing in a parking lot with a cell phone in my hand so I got the hell out of there.

Monday, Monday.
 
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